KAMALA HARRIS IS PRESIDENT!
(what follows here is satire)
HARRIS WON IN 2024.
TRUMP CHEATED.
It was a RIGGED ELECTION.
AMERICA – YOU GOT SCREWED!!! BY TRUMP AND HIS TREASONOUS MOB OF SYCOPHANTIC HENCHMEN AND LAWYERS!!!
I’m ABSOLUTELY CONVINCED that Trump faked his own assassination attempt. There are too many unexplained things that don’t make sense.
You’re telling me the SECRET SERVICE couldn’t secure the scene in Butler County, Pennsylvania? An open field with a couple of farm-looking buildings?
And a guy got shot by an AR-15 in his ear, and all he got was a pocket-knife wound? How did his ear not blow up? How is there not a hole in his ear?
Stinks to high heaven to me.
And all those counties Biden won in 2020, how’d they all magically flip to Trump?
You’re telling me that Trump went through all those criminal prosecutions, and after the January 6 mob did its thing, and that somewhere Trump actually GAINED votes in the middle between 2020 and 2024?
Elon Musk offering millions of dollars in exchange for votes. His late-stage endorsement. RFK, Jr. saying "I'll endorse whoever keeps me relevant, regardless of what you believe."
"Judge" Aileen Cannon.
Joe Rogan and Theo Von. DEEP STATE. COLLUSION.
PETER FREAKING THIEL!!!!!!
The Supreme Court! Republican Gerrymandering!
I've heard people say this, so it must be true:
You can't prove me wrong. So that means I'm right!
Give me a break.
I don’t buy it.
I don’t WANT to buy it.
Wait.
What’s that?
Someone found something on the internet that looks like pictures of people with what look like lots of ballots in Michigan, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania and Georgia! It’s real! J’accuse! J’accuse!
Oh, you want proof?
Oh baby.
I got proof.
It’s coming.
You wait.
You aren’t going to believe the proof I have.
I can’t show it to you yet though.
But just wait.
I will.
Two could play at this game.
Two don’t play at this game.
Because the Truth is that the Truth is the Truth.
And you have no role in deciding what the Truth is.
It just is.
People can’t win versus the Truth.